Really Funny Stuff

The most absent-minded of clergymen was a Methodist minister who served several churches each Sunday, riding from one to another on horseback. One Sunday morning he went to the stable while still meditating on his sermon and attempted to saddle the horse. After a long period of toil, he aroused to the fact that he had put the saddle on himself, and had spent a full half hour in vain efforts to climb on his own back.

The clergyman, absorbed in thinking out a sermon, rounded a turn in the path and bumped into a cow. He swept off his hat with a flourish, exclaiming:

“I beg your pardon, madam.”

Then he observed his error, and was greatly chagrined. Soon, however, again engaged with thoughts of the sermon, he collided with a lady at another bend of the path.

“Get out of the way, you brute!” he said.

The professor, who was famous for the wool-gathering of his wits, returned home, and had his ring at the door answered by a new maid. The girl looked at him inquiringly:

“Um—ah—is Professor Johnson at home?” he asked, naming himself.

“No, sir,” the maid replied, “but he is expected any moment now.”

The professor turned away, the girl closed the door. Then the poor man sat down on the steps to wait for himself.

The absentminded inventor perfected a parachute device. He was taken up in a balloon to make a test of the apparatus. Arrived at a height of a thousand feet, he climbed over the edge of the basket, and dropped out. He had fallen two hundred yards when he remarked to himself, in a tone of deep regret:

“Dear me! I’ve gone and forgotten my umbrella.”

The man of the house finally took all the disabled umbrellas to the
repairer’s. Next morning on his way to his office, when he got up to
leave the street car, he absentmindedly laid hold of the umbrella belonging to a woman beside him, for he was in the habit of carrying one. The woman cried “Stop thief!” rescued her umbrella and covered the man with shame and confusion.

That same day, he stopped at the repairer’s, and received all eight of his umbrellas duly restored. As he entered a street car, with the unwrapped umbrellas tucked under his arm, he was horrified to behold glaring at him the lady of his morning adventure. Her voice came to him charged with a withering scorn:

Here’s another What is this Picture

Look at the picture below and take a guess in the comments field as to what you think it might be. This is a hard one IMO, you may walk past something like this everyday, but because of our busy hectic lives I doubt you actually notice it.

Another cropped image, this time it’s cut almost in half, so you only see half the picture

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Couldn’t wait a while, so here’s another What is this Picture

Look at the picture below and take a guess in the comments field as to what you think it might be. This one is easier than the last one.

Click to see full picture

Another cropped image, so you are seeing part of the picture

Every so often I’m going to post an image (one taken by myself or family member so will be unique), but crop/edit it in a way that makes it difficult to see what the image really is.

Basically a Blog Comment Game called What is this Picture.

So look at the picture below and take a guess in the comments field as to what you think it might be. I don’t think anyone will get this one and it’s got an interesting story behind it involving the police!!

All I’ve done to obscure it is crop the surrounding material from the image, so you are looking at the center of the picture. there is no other editing or manipulation, this is a picture of something real.

A young girl was cooking a roast and cut the ends off of it and her husband told her she needs to leave it on as he thought it was the best part.

She told him that the roast wouldn’t come out perfect if she didn’t do it the way her Grandmother cooked it.

She had her family over for dinner and when the young woman put the roast on the table she told her Grandmother she hoped she made it like she always did?

Her Grandmother said it was good but wondered why the ends where cut?

The girl stated that was the way she always seen her make it!